Awareness and Life’s Continuity Issues

In one scene, the four circles of the Audi logo had been carefully removed from the back of the main characters’ SUV. In the next scene, it was magically back again. Then there is the gaping hole in the roof where a massive skylight had once been. It’s winter, and snow is falling through the hole in the roof, into the attic; but the people there are not cold. There is no steam coming from their mouths as they breath.

Then there was the uncle. The one who showed up unannounced in the middle of a torrential downpour. In one scene, he is literally soaked to the bone. In the next, he is seated at the dining room table, enjoying dinner in clothes that are bone dry.

These are all things from a show that Amanda and I have been watching together lately. As much as we are enjoying the show, we seem to also like a little game we play where we look for little inconsistencies in the production. They are referred to as “Continuity” issues. When either of us spots a continuity issue, we will say “Continuity!”

Yes, I know… being married to me is a thrill a minute!

The practice of awareness helps maintain continuity in my life. The benefits of this continuity are undeniable. It allows me to live out Step Twelve, which tells me to practice spiritual principles in all of my affairs. Thus, being aware of any continuity issues in my life is an absolute necessity. Of course, simply being aware is sometimes not enough.

Denial can often become a roadblock to awareness. Another, more subtle roadblock pops up when I acknowledge the fact that there is a problem in my life; but convince myself that it will go away on its own. Or that I can somehow make it go away by sheer force of will.

For most recovering addicts, a sponsor is usually the first person to spot these acts of denial or thoughts that things will just sort themselves out. In my case, it is usually my wife Amanda who first spots these troubling continuity issues. (I had been concerned about this fact at one time, thinking that I was underutilizing my sponsor. He, however, assured me that her ability to spot continuity issues in my life is a sign of a healthy relationship; and that he would be concerned if she didn’t spot them.)

Lately, I’ve been experiencing a pretty serious continuity issue. It is one that has stolen a lot of my serenity, and has made me less than fun to live with at times. The things I normally do in recovery were not proving adequate to address these issues, so Amanda suggested I visit with a therapist we have both worked with about my struggles.

In this case, my conversations with Amanda brought awareness; and my visit with our therapist helped bring clarity to the situation. As a result, I can already see a clear path to restoring serenity in this particular area of my life.

Because I am willing today to confront life’s continuity issues, I find myself more at peace than ever before. One of the beautiful things about not having to recover alone is that when my awareness is failing, I have people in my life who love me enough to share theirs with me. Thus, I am reminded that we do recover.

Have a remarkable day!